I delayed this article, wanting to read all the books before talking about the bitter taste I got. I admit – I finished the third book from pure stubbornness and the fourth one is completely out of my motivation and interest to read.
“Twilight” is the bastard you will get by mixing Jane Austin and Daniel Steel. With supernatural creatures and very bad messages. Don’t get me wrong – I like Austin’s novels very much – they are intelligent, sensitive, passionate, thrilling. Practically, everything Twilight is not, but wants to be.
All characters are so annoyingly flat – they are to similar, very superficial, very 2D into a 3D world.
I expected them to evolve, to change, to develop somehow, no matter in which direction. Unfortunately, from the very beginning to the very end of this apotheosis of the wretched imitation of literature, the characters did not move an inch.
Eduard is a tyran, a manipulative bastard – he does not even know what personal space means – he controls her every single move – from sneaking in her bedroom, listening to her deliriums, asking his fortune-telling sister to permanently track on Bella’s future, only because he was not able to read her mind, taking practically every decision instead of her, manipulating her choice, emotionally blackmailing her – all of this of course pleasantly packed with the pink ribbon of the sake of her safety and because he loves her so so much. Of course.
He wants to marry her, or at last be officially engaged in order to have sex – you might think it is noble, but no, it isn’t. It is sick and wrong. Bella is just 18 years old, she definitely should do much more things before getting married. For example, getting to know the opposite sex better, could help a lot in building a healthy, informed, based on mutual pleasure choice of a partner. Anyway.
Bella is mediocre, boring and stupid. Ah, yeah, she is also an elephant in a glassware store. The ultimate quality she possess is that she smells extremely appetizing to Eduard. And that’s all. Oh, I forgot – he couldn’t read her mind, which was also kind of exciting for him. Well, dear boy, I hate to kill your enthusiasm, but may be the reason for that is because her mind is empty?!? Trivial, I know, but quite true. Bella wants only one thing – to be with Eduard. She doesn’t have any dreams, ambitions, desires to achieve something. She doesn’t even have interests. All she does is to whimper, worry, scream for help and mutter. Or worship the divine beauty of Eduard’s.
Their relation is based entirely on repeating to one another that they love each other very much and cannot live without each other. And that’s all. No intellectual, or real emotional connection. Just “I don’t want to live without you” and “I love you” until you are sick and eventually dead of it. Four books they didn’t find anything else to talk about.
Maybe the most annoying thing in the whole book are the vampires itself. A mockery of the sacred orthodox of the vampires, those ones even shine on the sunlight. Whether this is due to the author’s ignorance, or her desire to construct something from what she have heard and picked from here and there, the concept of angel looking, human protecting vampires, who even despite of being practically dead and with poison running instead of blood, manage to have erection and fertilize a human being – wow, it can’t be more brilliant than that, can it?
Dear Ms. Meyer, Stephenie, I hope you did manage to make a lot of money from the bullshit you put in written – I hope you at last made enough, to live happily ever after and focus on other activities instead of writing – training pigs to find truffles would be a very proper one. Unfortunate as it is, your writings are crippled, absurd and inadequate. Your inability to develop characters is disturbing. Your lack of imagination, lack of playing with images, even lack of finding different symbols and analogies is disturbing.
Being such a bitch is just one of the services I offer, but here I am not alone: “Both Rowling and Meyer, they’re speaking directly to young people. … The real difference is that Jo Rowling is a terrific writer and Stephenie Meyer can’t write worth a darn. She’s not very good.” – says the great Stephen King. Who am I to argue him?
I strongly advise not to waste time and watch the movie, it is not even amusingly stupid. Take your partner to a nice restaurant instead, you will get more credits. But if you still feel you miss something – here is a review.