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Cryptoparty founder quit over misogyny, sexism, and harassment – what role can FSFE play?

Some time at the end of last year, a woman who was a founding member of Cryptoparty, a phenomena which has reached even sunny old Manchester, England, quit because of the treatment she had received by male hackers. Her post resignation blog is extremely angry. Here are my musings on what she said.

This is Asher

She sounds a bit loopy… but then aren’t we all?

So, this blog of hers isn’t easy reading. Its true that she is writing at a really bad time in her life as a computer activist. Putting aside the intimidate situation, this woman may be, or may not, be hot headed, unbalanced or whatever. I don’t know her personally, so I really have no idea. But if she is those things, it’s not because she is a woman.

Hacktivism culture is in some ways defined by our wonderfully tenacious, unyielding, obsessive and obstinate personalities. That’s why we end up here! We see the evil in the world and refuse to obey and conform to rules we disagree with and we are prepared to say so… some of us even say so in secretive, clever, devious and subversive ways which scare and confuse governments… What’s psychologically balanced about that?

A Cryptoparty poster from Chilie

I think issues of her individual personality are basically irrelevant to the discussion. The same applies to weather or not she is some kind of extremist. There are lots of those around in hacktivism too, I’m sure.

Those first few months should be special.

“I’ve gone from being a Facebook user to running OTR, PGP and Tor all in under a month.”

I found this part of Ashers blog so evocative. I too went though this huge transformation, a few years ago, for me it was also during that time that got the most hurt and angry. At first I judged Asher harshly for her abusive language in this post, and then I remembered the time when that was me, screaming blue murder on an email list, trying to hurt the people there like they had hurt me. (It didn’t work).

Those first few months of enlightenment should be a special time, but I wonder how many women end those months like Me and Asher: suddenly exposed to the most ruthless and cruel forms of sexism, suddenly left feeling very alone. Luckily for me, Sam Tuke turned up, I found FSFE, and all was well. But for Asher?

“I’ll go back to child-rearing and tweeting in the lull while the toddler is occupied and amused…for now.”

Did the Cryptoparty community try and cut her out? Or is this normal?

She starts by describing small things, I wondered at this stage if her anger was justified

“A number of Cyptoparty organizers regularly talked down to me when I questioned their choices, suggested I wasn’t qualified to comment on their actions. And then they left me to face public scrutiny when the shit hit the fan over their stupid decisions …” and “When I communicated about concerns and issues […] I got put downs, got brushed off, ignored, […] aggravatingly told that I wasn’t qualified to judge their choices as I wasn’t a crypto-expert or a hacker. And I got told to quit. Quite a bit, actually.”

Okay, so there are some nasty people and lots of know-it-all’s out there. I am used to that. I think she is too – she lived on the streets at one point in her life. She isn’t exactly a shrinking violet…

But then it gets a bit odd…

“Multiple Cryptoparty IRC channels were created and the people creating them didn’t inform the general public about them, and didn’t add them to the wiki. Some of the servers they placed the IRC channels for Cryptoparties on were almost impossible to access.”

Were these people intentionally trying to keep her out? Was it because of her gender?

“One day I made it into one of the Cryptoparty IRC rooms – under a different handle than usual – and watched.watched a bunch of male Cryptoparty organisers talking about me – about how I knew nothing about crypto (well, that much was true, but the point had always been to build an educational bridge) and that “real hackers” should be the face of Cryptoparty, not a “mommy-type.”

Another Cryptoparty poster

Well this gets really quite scandalous… but then again, its just a few guys on a secret IRC. After all, if tree falls in an empty wood, does it really make a sound?

“When my “web-developer” (guy she barley new but gave money to to build a website) got in contact next it was to tell me he’d gone on holidays and had presented Cryptoparty at the European Commission’s “No Disconnect” meeting. He hadn’t discussed it with me before-hand. I still have no idea what representations he made to the E.C. about Cryptoparty. He never reported his talk with the E.C. to the Cryptoparty wiki.”

Wile I can see why he might not need to talk to her directly, after all Cryptoparty has “Decentralised, DIY, psuedo-leadership”, he should surely have put this on the wiki?

“When I tried to discuss the issue, he /rage-quit the conversation.”

It seems to me that there were some strange things going on here. I don’t think these are random acts of selfishness. I think that “they” tried to cut her out of the movement that she had helped create.

Left behind…

Next Asher tried to get a speaker spot at Chaos Communication Congress, a big deal for a single mum with no money. Her talk was rejected.

Part of the issue was that other, wealthier members of Cryptoparty were already going /speaking, so her talk application had to become a panel application so they would be included.

The situation sounds pretty toxic by now, in the end, her application got refused because she needed to take some people off the panel… it’s hard to grasp the details but it sounds like no-one would quit the panel voluntarily and she didn’t know what to do. So her application was rejected, the boys all went to the event without her and Asher was left to watch their twitter feeds and talks on-line…

“So by the time 29c3 properly got underway, my nose was more than a little out of joint. And I stopped sleeping properly.” 

These people are under her skin, but are they hurting too? Probably not.

Next comes the moment that pushes a woman who was key to founding an internationally successful event out of haktivism, maybe even for good…

The creeper card woman

“I reached peak rage as the ‘Creeper Card’ issue unfolded at 29c3. You might have read about the cards, if you were watching the 29c3 twitter stream.”

I didn’t know about this, but to summarise: at some events, people can give green, yellow or red cards to other people. The cards are designed to simply and clearly tell people if and when their behaviour is out of line, primarily in a sexual way.

“At 29C3, someone took a bunch of the ‘Creeper Cards’ and made them into a statement all of their own. An image of a headless female body.”

Why is the creeper card woman not funny?

Okay so she has no face, no head to keep her brain in, no arms to defend herself with (or hack with for that matter)… but maybe its too hard to make a face out of little red cards. Maybe the paper was to narrow to give her arms. Anyway, as long as she has boobs and a vagina, she’s good to go right?

I guess it this picture could be amusing in the same way that Mark Titchner’s work “We Want to Nurture and Protect” is amusing. Maybe the headless creeper card woman was made to be ironic too. Probably not though.

Even if it wasn’t made to be ironic, its still amusing… right? It’s like some kind of subversive cave art. “Me like naked lady, me drag naked lady by her hair, me do the naked lady… even though the lady doesn’t like it and waves a red card at me” – it’s just a little celebration of all things nerd, right? A bit like the IT crowd and Big Bang Theory…. no wait… those were still made by people WITH social skills to mock the nerd boys without them…

So its more like if the IT crowd and Big Bang Theory are real and… and that one of the boy nerds had done something “funny” but that had coincidently really really hurt a woman at the other side of the world who’s own funny pet-group-of-idiot-geek-boys had ridiculed and isolated her so much that she wasn’t sleeping any more… and so she quit the nerd club never to be seen again…

How the creeper card woman feels on the inside

And there, that’s why its not funny…  I can laugh cause I am laughing AT the person who made it, and because I am safely surrounded by gentle, reasonable people right now. But I can see why it was the final straw for Asher…

“I’m sure, if it wasn’t for the fact I was incredibly pi**ed off about how I’ve been treated by some elements of the hacker community, then maybe I would have found some aspect of the ‘Creeper Card’ image funny. Maybe. I didn’t. Instead, when I saw the Headless Female ‘Creeper Card’ image I blacked out with pure rage for more than a few seconds. And then I publicly railed, in unholy unrestrained outrage for all the ways I had lost my faith in members of the hacker community over the last few months.”

Should people like Asher stay and change hacker culture?

“After I quit Cryptoparty people responded that I had to stay, had to take responsibility for changing the culture of the community. I was beyond tact. I howled “f*** you” back at them repeatedly. I was sick to death of being constantly requested to fix other people’s shitty behaviour.”

She has a point. I am not even sure its possible for one women to to simply “fix” these individuals or small organisations. And even if it were, it’s certainly not our job. Asher has a point when she says “You shouldn’t need a red card wagged in your face to let you know your behaviour is s***full.”

Who should fix this problem then?

I think in this instance it is organisations like FSFE who should be activity involved in remedying these issues. At FSFE we have the strength, numbers and positive support networks to make a difference without getting hurt as individuals.

This don’t mean that FSFE should spend it’s time getting involved in global flamewars while we could be doing something useful…

FSFE stopped me from dropping out of Free Software when I was being treated badly by a group of guys. They did this just by being friendly and treating me with respect.We just need to do the same thing but bigger. After all, it was just luck that I met Sam Tuke when I did.

So we need to be active, not in the sense of “positive discrimination” but in the sense of having a clear, outward facing and visible statement of our belief that women are equal, welcome and vital to what we do here. That ALL people are welcome (as long as they welcome all people).

I want all women in this situation to find and get involved with great organisations like ours and discover that they will be treated properly. I don’t want Free Software (and co) to lose a single person because of discrimination or bullying.

It’s never too late

Ashers blog has been bouncing around on the Flossie and Gender Changers lists today. Here is one particularly insightful response:

“Got to say, when this kind of s**t occasionally hits the fan for me, it’s also usually *afterwards* that I get messages of support and I notice this as a pattern. My main comment here is that we need to work out how to ask for help and support each other before it comes to stressful breakdown of an energetic woman’s commitment.” – Paula, Fossbox

I think Paula has hit the nail on the head. Most of the women I know in Free Software are either new, or tough as old boots. I know there are many many more women who simply quit, like Asher has done, for the same/similar reasons.

We have to make sure that the next time a woman wants to quit – that we find her, or that she finds us, and we help her. Then perhaps she will help us, and everybody wins. Except the people who told her to quit.

Why we should we care?

I really think this list of past and future Cryptoparties, borrowed from the Cryptoparty Wiki, says everything about Ashers Story, and everything about what the women we have lost along the way could be doing right now, if we had been there for them when they needed us.

Africa

Asia

Australia

  • Canberra / Australian Capital Territory, Australia
  • Sydney/ New South Wales, Australia
    • Next CryptoParty March 27 9pm
  • Adelaide / South Australia, Australia
  • Melbourne/ Victoria, Australia
  • Perth / Western Australia, Australia
  • Hobart / Tasmania, Australia

Europe

Austria

Belgium

Denmark

  • Copenhagen/ Denmark
    • Thursday, 17th January 2013 (maybe)
    • Sunday, 20th January 2013 (confirmed)

Estonia

France

Germany

Greece

Iceland

Ireland

Italy

  • Firenze/ Italy
    • Wednesday 13th February, 2013
  • Rende/ Italy
    • Wednesday 27th March, 2013

Luxembourg

Netherlands

Norway

Poland

  • Warsaw/ Poland
    • Every Thursday

Romania

  • Bucharest/ Romania
    • Monday 11th February, 2013

Russia

Serbia

Slovakia

Spain

Switzerland

United Kingdom

India

Middle East

North America

USA

Canada

América del Sur (South America)

Oceania / Pacific

  • Oahu / Honolulu, Hawaii, USA

Online

Previous CryptoParties

Africa

  • Tunis/ Tunisia
    • Tuesday 27th November, 2012
    • Saturday, 1st December, 2012

Asia

  • Manila/ Philippines
    • Saturday 13th October, 2012

Australia

  • Canberra/ Australian Capital Territory, Australia
    • Saturday 1st September, 2012
  • Sydney/ New South Wales, Australia
    • Saturday 1st September, 2012
    • Saturday 13th October, 2012
    • Saturday 24th November, 2012
  • Adelaide/ South Australia, Australia
    • Sunday 23rd September, 2012
  • Melbourne/ Victoria, Australia
    • Saturday 22nd September, 2012 Voice & Video messages from around the globe: International Messages
    • Saturday 27th October, 2012
    • Wednesday 28th November,2012
  • Perth/ Western Australia, Australia
    • Thursday 27th September, 2012
  • Hobart/ Tasmania, Australia
    • Thursday 22th November 2012

Europe

Austria

  • UdernsZillertal/ Austria
    • Thursday 11th October, 2012
  • Vienna/ Austria
    • Monday 24th September,2012
    • Monday 29th October, 2012
    • Monday 26th November 2012, 2012
    • Monday 17th December 2012

Belgium

  • Brussels/ Belgium
    • Saturday 13th October, 2012

Denmark

  • Copenhagen/ Denmark
    • Wednesday 14th November, 2012
    • Sunday, 16th December 2012
  • Aarhus/ Denmark
    • Tuesday, February 18, 2013

Estonia

  • Tartu/ Estonia
    • Tuesday, 20th of November 2012

France

  • Angers/ France
    • Saturday 15th December 2012
  • Lille/ France
    • Saturday 25th September 2010
  • Marseille/ France
    • Friday, 11th January, 2013
    • Saturday, 9th February, 2013
    • Saturday, 16th February, 2013
  • Nantes/ France
    • Saturday 10th November 2012
    • Saturday 8th December 2012
  • Paris/ France
    • Saturday 17th of November, 2012
  • Toulouse/ France
    • Wednesday 24th October, 2012

Germany

  • Berlin/ Germany
    • Friday 31st August, 2012
    • Friday 28th September, 2012
    • Friday 7th December, 2012
  • Cologne/ Germany
    • Thursday, 20th December, 2012
    • Thursday, 17th January, 2013
  • Darmstadt/ Germany
    • Wednesday 5th December, 2012
  • Dresden/ Germany
    • Thursday, 6th December 2012
  • Düsseldorf
    • Saturday, 17th November, 2012
  • Frankfurt/ Germany
    • Sunday 16th December, 2012
    • February 2013
  • Hamburg/ Germany
    • Friday 28th December, 2012
    • ~January 2013
  • Jena/ Germany
    • Friday, 23rd November, 2012
    • Friday, 25th January, 2013
  • Freiburg
    • Saturday, 16th February, 2013

Greece

  • Athens/ Greece
    • Sunday 11th November, 2012
    • Sunday 23rd December, 2012

Iceland

Luxembourg

    • Saturday 12th January, 2013

Netherlands

  • Amsterdam/ Netherlands
    • Thursday 27th September, 2012
    • Monday 3th December, 2012

Norway

  • Oslo/ Norway
    • Friday 16th November, 2012

Poland

  • Warsaw/ Poland
    • Every Thursday

Romania

  • Bucharest
    • Friday, 8th February 2012 (keepass + truecrypt)

Russia

  • Moscow/ Russia
    • Monday 26th November, 2012
    • ~December, 2012

Slovakia

  • Bratislava/ Slovakia
    • Thursday 4th October, 2012
    • Tuesday 27th November, 2012

Spain

  • Barcelona/ Spain
    • Saturday 15th December, 2012

Sweden

  • Umeå/ Sweden
    • Thursday 1st November, 2012
  • Stockholm/ Sweden
    • Saturday 16th February, 2013

Switzerland

  • Zurich/ Switzerland
    • Friday 28th September, 2012
    • Saturday 23th February, 2013

UK and Ireland

India

Middle East

  • Cairo/ Egypt
    • Saturday 15th September, 2012
  • Tel Aviv/ Israel
    • Sunday 4th November, 2012
    • December, 2012 (TBD)

North America

USA

  • New York City/ New York, USA
    • Wednesday 5th December, 2012
  • Oakland/ California, USA
    • Sunday 14th October, 2012
  • San Diego/ California, USA
    • Sunday 14th October, 2012
  • San Francisco/ California, USA
    • Saturday 17th November, 2012
  • Stanford University, Stanford/ California, USA
    • Sunday 24th February, 2013
  • Meriden/ Connecticut, USA
    • Saturday 15th December, 2012
  • Washington, DCDistrict of Columbia, USA
    • Sunday 14th October, 2012
  • Chicago/ Illinois, USA
    • Saturday 6th October, 2012
    • Saturday 15th December, 2012
    • Sunday, 3rd February, 2013
  • Boston/ Massachusetts, USA
    • Sunday 21st October, 2012
  • Minneapolis/ Minnesota, USA
    • Saturday 6th October, 2012
    • Sunday 28th October, 2012
  • Portsmouth/ New Hampshire, USA
    • Thursday 13th September, 2012
  • Durham/ North Carolina, USA
    • Monday, November 19th, 2012
  • Las Vegas/ Nevada, USA
    • 3rd Thursday of every month
  • Syracuse/ New York, USA
    • Thursday 18th October, 2012
  • Philadelphia/ Pennsylvania, USA
    • Saturday 22nd September 2012 – Meet & Greet
    • TBD in October, 2012
  • Cookeville/ Tennessee, USA
    • Monday 27th August, 2012
    • Thursday 27th September, 2012
    • Thursday 15th November, 2012

Canada

  • Vancouver/ British Columbia, Canada
    • Friday 21st September, 2012
    • Saturday, November 3, 2012
  • Winnipeg/ Winnipeg, Canada
    • Saturday, 6th October, 2012
    • Saturday, 5th January, 2013
  • Toronto/ Ontario, Canada
    • Thursday 11th, October 2012
  • Kitchener-Waterloo

América del Sur (South America)

  • Santiago/ Santiago de Chile.
    • Friday 28th September, 2012

Oceania / Pacific

  • Oahu/ Honolulu, Hawaii, USA
    • Sunday 30th September, 2012
    • Tuesday 11th December, 2012

Online

  • Online/ Online CryptoParty
    • Wednesday 26th September, 2012
    • Saturday 6th October, 2012
    • Saturday 15th December, 2012

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